나 영어 문장 고치는것좀 도와줘ㅠ_ㅠ..

And랑 So를 쓰지말라고하시는데

어떻게 안쓰고 문장을 이어가게 해?ㅠㅠ..

I will reach my dream weight and wear whatever I want and go to the beach when Summer comes. And I will travel to various places.

There are still more things I want to do other than these three things I have listed so far, but if I do acheive those three things, I'll be enough with that. 

My next year will be very enjoyable. And even if I couldn't acheive all of those things after trying my best, that's fine. Effort is the one that counts.

흐어엉.. 두번째꺼는 문장시작하는의미로 쓰이는 거 아니지않아? 왜 체크하셨을까ㅠㅠ

[익인1]

Also나 As a result등 다른말로바꾸면되지않을까

[글쓴이]

아아!!!!!! 같은 의미인 걸로!..

[익인2]

And 는 in addition, furthermore, moreover, also 등등으로 대체 가능해

[익인3]

I will also
Listed above,
마지막은 and 안써도 됨

[글쓴이]

헐헐.. 고마워..!!!!!ㅠㅠㅠㅠ진짜고마워