영어 잘하는 익들아 문법 틀린거 있나 봐줄수 ㅇ있어??

아니면 어색한 부분이라던가 !!

Growing up as a female in this society made me be aware of this topic. From learning reading and hearing many different things, I found out that lots of women in this society are often not being treated equally and given the same opportunities as men. However, I think women deserve to have all the same right men has and all sexuality deserves to be equal on all level.

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두번째문장에 are often not 보단 aren't often 이 좀더 자연스러워보여

[익인3]

men has??? men have로 바꿔야한느거아냐??

[익인2]

made me aware(be빼구)
are often being treated unequally and are not given~
all the same right's'

이정도? 잘 썼당!

[익인4]

밑줄친문장은 문법이랑 좀 이상한것같아서 다시 수정하는게좋을둣해!!